Man turns up at the Pearly Gates ----

a425couple

2021-07-07 15:13:08 UTC

Post by a425couple
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Posted by Douglas Porter June 29
Saint Peter is on duty at the Pearly Gates when a man turns up, gives
his name, and the Saint looks in the book and says: “Sorry, it’s not
looking good here, I don’t know if I can let you in. But just in case
the Recording Angel missed anything — can you think of any good reason
why I should let you in? Anything especially good you ever did?”
And the man says “On earth I was a commercial traveller, and I pulled
into a lay-by one time to see a gang of bikers harassing this young
woman. Things seemed to be getting a bit serious, so I grabbed a tyre
iron out of my car, I smacked the biggest one of them around the ear,
and I said ‘All right, you bunch of c***s, leave this girl alone or
you’re going to have to deal with me!’ “
“That sounds impressive, I’m surprised the Angel missed it,” says Saint
Peter. “When did this happen?”
“…About three minutes ago,” says the man.

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Richard Jones
22h ago
A man is sure that his wife is having an affair so he gets home from
work early and sneaks in. There she is, his wife, laid in bed in just a
negligee, but, on her own. He is so annoyed that he has missed the
mystery man, but, looking out of the open window of the room he sees a
man hurriedly walking away whilst pulling his over coat on. So incensed
is he that his prey is getting away that he lifts the fridge up and
throws it out of the window, hitting the man on the head. Unfortunately,
the effort of lifting the fridge and throwing it causes the mans heart
to give out, and he floats up to the pearly gates through the tunnel of
light. Arriving at the gates, there is a bit of a queue of people
waiting to get in. The first person is asked by St Peter, “How did you
die?” “Well,” says the man, “It’s a bit of a mystery actually. I was
late for work and rushing for my bus when I was hit by a fridge, and I
woke up here.” “That might be my fault,” says the cuckolded husband. “I
thought you were having an affair with my wife, and threw the fridge out
of the window. Then I too woke up here.” “How did you die?” asks St
Peter to the 3rd man in the queue. “Well,” says the man, “I was sitting
in this fridge……………..”